Testimonials

The realisation I made back in November 2023 is a fairly simple one as a concept, ‘If time as we know it was created by people, then as a person, I can influence and rewrite it’. However, exerting influence over something that is a foundational building block of the current society was always going to be a daunting task. Or at least that’s what I thought it would be as I steeled myself to work on influencing time. Consciousness had other ideas. 

A bit of context. I work in a supermarket with one of my roles being a baker, which means that I need to be in the bakery by 5am to get everything ready to open at 8am. Being in the UK, the zoom calls are in the evening with You 2.0 starting at 9pm finishing at roughly 10:30pm. In order to get myself ready for work, my alarm is set for 3:30am. The store I work at, is roughly a 20 minute drive across town with average luck at the traffic lights and roundabouts that punctuate the stretches of roads either side of the dual carriageway. I set my alarm after You 2.0, and settle down to sleep. Now I’m lucky, my connection manifests mainly through clairaudience, so I hear voices.

I’m woken up by my guardian angel, Amber, not my alarm which is very strange for a workday, so I check the clock on my bedside table. 

4:55am

I’m out of bed and dressed without even thinking to ask Amber what’s going on. I have a lot of equipment that I carry, so it takes me a couple of minutes to get dressed. Regardless I stumble out of the house and into my Mum’s car that I was car sharing at the time. The keys are turned and the engine roars into life. I check the dashboard clock.

4:55am

Okay! I made it here in under a minute. That shouldn’t be possible. Plugging my phone in, I select a song ‘Red Windows’ by nostraightanswer, it’s 5 minutes and 11 seconds long, it shows me on the satnav screen under the dashboard clock. I put it on loop, slam the car in reverse and rush off the drive. I believe the second that the song restarts I’m late for work. 

Window down, hopeful the frigid autumn air will blow away the bedhead I was rocking, volume up. Nothing on the estate as I clear the first roundabout. I ask the question.

“Amber, how do I get to work on time?”

‘Jay, it's only time. You get to work on time as long as you know you do.’

Helpful. I know I get to work on time? I know I will get to work on time?

“🎤Next Time, let it go

 Break my skin, red windows”

I start to sing along with the chorus as I pull out onto the second roundabout. Still no cars. I glance at the screen as I take my exit. Song has been on for a minute and a half. Straight road ahead of me, I’m in my mum's turbo sporty SUV. PUT YOUR FOOT DOWN SON! The engine roars as I change through the gears, barreling towards the first set of lights in my path. 

They change to red. 

They don’t want to be red. You don’t want to be red. You want to be a green light! The lights flash yellow again. Put my foot back on the accelerator as they go green.

“🎤To my soul

  So I’ll know”

Race down the road, approaching the third roundabout, there’s a car coming. I start to break.

‘He’s turning off.’

“He’s not indicating, Am.”

‘Just keep going.’

“Amber!”

‘Fine.’

His indicator goes on, he’s turning off before me. We rush past each other as I enter the roundabout, skipping across it and off at my exit. An intersection lay before me, three sets of lights - SPEED CAMERA!

“🎤BREAK my skin

  Red windows”

Trundle past the camera at 25mph, through the first set of lights. Through the second. No cars on the intersection, the camera firmly in the rearview mirror. Start to pick up speed through the third set of lights, onto the dual carriageway. The fastest way to get across town.

“🎤In time, let it show

  Broken skin

  Red windows”

It takes a second for the realisation to set in. The song was over. Five minutes had passed. I wasn’t even halfway there. I forced myself to look at the clock. To get the confirmation I was dreading. It read

4:56am

What? The song’s rolled over. It’s time on the satnav’s screen has restarted. I’ve sung, poorly, five minutes worth of song. If it had taken me five minutes to get to this point, it would be a quick journey. 

One minute has passed.

I know I will get to work on time. I get to work on time!

Dual carriageway is empty, this is it! No lights, no roundabouts for a few miles. No mobile speed traps at this time! Foot down, let's burn some miles. I can do this, I can-

WHY ARE THERE LORRIES OVERTAKING EACH OTHER?

I settle in on the overtaking lane, behind lorry two, watching its mission to overtake lorry one. Must be doing 1mph more, but boy is he going for it. 

“🎤As if flows

  Even if our bodies start to burn”

I was burning with emotion alright. I had no idea what to think. Then it crept in. I wasn't going to make it. I’d been in such a panic, I’d yet to even consider I might not make it to work on time. I looked at the clock.

4:56am

Suck it ego, we're doing this. I’m getting to work on time, even if I have to rewind time. Just watch me!

“🎤To my soul

 So I’ll know”

The lorry succeeds in its glorious quest, and I speed past them both, wishing them well on their journeys. The rest of the dual carriage goes well. Then it happens again.

“🎤In time, let it show

  Broken skin

  Red windows”

Song’s over again. Another five minutes have passed. Clock says!

4:57am

Two roundabouts, two lights. Two roundabouts, two lights. There's no mobile speed trap at the other point on the dual carriageway they set it up at. Check the speedo, I’m not even speeding? What? Why aren’t I speeding?

‘You don’t need to.’

“Yeah but can I?”

‘If you want. You won’t go faster.’

I reached the second to last roundabout. No cars. First exit, and I'm off again.

“🎤Next time, let it go

  Break my skin, red windows”

Check the song’s clock, am I close to the end of the third round? It’s stuck at 3:22. The song’s playing, but its clock isn’t ticking.

‘It was distracting.’

“Amber! You can’t just break it!”

‘Why can’t I?’

Why can’t she? Through the traffic lights. Why can’t I? Last roundabout, all clear. The intersection. The last set of lights. I can see the building! Red light. Red light! I-I’ll run it. One car sits across the intersection.

A police car.

“🎤I don’t want our night, the night, tonight to end”

I come to a halt at the lights. Clock check.

4:59 am

Waiting.

Waiting.

Waiting.

Green light.

Through the intersection, onto the industrial estate, into the store’s carpark. Park, grab my bag, stall the car. STALL THE CAR. Engine off, key out, door open. Run across the car park. Run through the front entrance, through the inner entrance. Run up to the employee door, get the keycode wrong, NOT TODAY, the second time I get it. Throw open the door, rush past my confused colleagues to the clock-in machine. Key on, clock in, check time.

5:01am

Deep breath. Step back.

Machine screen’s flashes. Message displayed.

‘Clock in successful.

Clock in time

5:00’

“Hey, Amber?”

‘Yeah?’

“Think next time, we could fit in a shower?”

‘As long as I don’t have to make breakfast.’

I’ve never been late to anything since.

🎤So I’ll know

    Next time, let it go

    Break my skin, so I’ll know

    In time, let it show

    Broken skin

    Red windows🎤